Rant about love

20 Feb 2011 1 Comment

by Katherine Anne McCluer in Uncategorized

WHAT? you people are all crazy. crazy people. doing crazy things. love. love love love love. can’t you tell? Its way more important. I would love it if….what if….what if…….maybe one day……
none of this can possibly be true. none of these people can be serious. I have so much to give. I have so much to say. Only around the right people. The right people give me the right things to say. But maybe they are just easy to talk to. Maybe I’m only easy to talk to around people who are easy to talk to.
maybe I deny myself something. maybe I deny myself creditability. I want..I want……a love that lasts lasts lasts lasts forever. and that maybe quite idealistic. But it’s mine. it’s my stupid cliche optimistic desire. I want someone to cling, cling, cling, cling on to me. I think I got it. I think I have it. I’m sick. sick
to my stomach. because because because well…..if I’m wrong, then everything will go wrong. i don’t want it to. I don’t want it to go wrong. I’m too serious. He’s too serious. I love so many things. I don’t think your 20′s is a time to fuck around. I just want to find a great person and cling, cling cling, and love love, love.
love the best that i can. be the best that i can. connections……they come and go. Stephanie says…it’s not like he’s the one you will marry. Taylor says he’s a good person to be with in her 20′s but she doesn’t think they will stay together. but she still stays. these are things i’ve been told. I don’t care. it’s impossible. I keep repeating myself. But it’s absolutely certainly almost impossibly the biggest wish of mine. So many things look good on paper. I don’t want them. I want a million things but
the biggest hugest desire is to have someone be cosmically connected. to me. to me. It’s not just my desire. It’s girly. It’s feminine. Our society deems feminine desires as disgusting. Not desirable desires to have. You’re only a feminist if you don’t want those girly things. I don’t care. I’m very much a feminist and I want
all those things. There’s nothing wrong with not wanting these things. I Do. I hope they happen. I hope we happen. I hope we last forever and ever and prove them all wrong.

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